Posts Tagged ‘water’

NBA superstar LeBron James prepares to “dive into” his next adventure

Duke Savage

Miami, FL

With the NBA lockout looming many of the NBA players are looking for alternative means of income to support their ungodly lavish lifestyles. Some, like Deron Williams, are playing overseas where the expectations are somewhat lower and they can easily become the most notable star within miles. Nate Robinson is pondering testing his luck in the NFL because for some reason his circle feels that his generously listed 5′ 9″ stature lends itself perfectly to the NFL’s hard-hitting game. Being the showman that LeBron James is, he could not simply settle for switching over to such a conventional sport so he held “The Decision II” a year after he wasted America’s time with his decision to piggy back Dwayne Wade in Miami. After four long hours where James repeatedly insisted the entire point of his TV special was “for the kids of the Boys and Girls Clubs of Miami”, he finally told the world of his plans. “This year, during the NBA lockout, I plan on taking my talents underwater. I am going to pursue my passion of underwater basket weaving.” Hubie Brown, who was conducting the interview, had to be resuscitated after the jaw dropping news. After he was brought back to life, for the fourth time during the last month, his first response was, “What…in…the…*bleep*?” “Ya know Hubie, I’ve always been an avid fan of the water and enjoy swimming in my free time. During my childhood I was swimming in my grandmother’s pool when I found some wooden strips at the bottom. I just started weaving them…it felt natural” followed James without skipping a beat. Although this has helped LeBron gain much of his older fan base back (especially those elderly ladies who plan on tuning to his new series “Woven Art With The King”) but it is seriously hurting his “street cred”. Whether or not you agree with LeBron’s plan of attack to continue to make gobs of money during the lockout you have to admire his pizzazz and enthusiasm. It will take a LOT of basket sales to match the $15 million a year that LeBron will lose with a lockout. Not to mention, the new version of his shoe, the LeBron IX will have to be completely scrapped for a super cool aqua sock, not one of Nike’s specialties. I would not suggest buying one of these baskets however. If history is any indication, the first three-quarters of the baskets will be amazing but the fourth will flat-out suck.